My mother is one of the most devoted and compassionate people I know. While married to my father who was a career firefighter and paramedic, she had a career of her own. She taught preschool in our small midwestern community, raised two children, coached travel soccer, and regularly served her church community. Now in retirement, she’s a grandma to seven grandchildren, visits nieces and nephews, and spends time caring for those who have instilled friendship and love into her life. 

At the heart of her commitment to others is a motto she regularly guided us with, “It’s about the people.” 

The Loss of Community Life

My mother taught us that individuals from all walks of life are worth their value beyond what any system or institution would label or dismiss them as. When we fail to acknowledge one another as fellow humans on life’s great journey, we lose what makes our society function and thrive. Fair economic systems, just laws and enforcement, diverse and inclusive communities, and solutions that promote the welfare of all members of society are the expected results of a shared belief that people come first.

Today, modern American cities and rural communities bear the scars of transactional relationships in place of invested relationships. Social Scientist and Professor Robert Putnam documented this trend in extensive detail at the turn of the century in a groundbreaking book, Bowling Alone. In the updated 20th Anniversary Edition (2020), Putnam reflected on the past twenty years with an ominous outlook:

“We have now witnessed a further two decades of the bitter fruits seeded by a disconnected and divided society. And in a full realization of where we’re likely headed, we may yet find the inspiration we need to restore our bonds, mend our bridges, and bend the course of history.”[1]

Neighborhoods and communities around the country are increasingly void of the essential ethos contributing to their flourishing –– people meaningfully engaged with one another. 

Modern American cities and rural communities bear the scars of transactional relationships in place of invested relationships.

In the national conversation, there are rising voices in our society where grievances, anxiety, and revolutionary impulses are rising. It’s the result of an increasingly splintered society, weakening democratic values, and global systems fraying in their ability to serve the whole, leaving large groups of people unseen, behind, or unjustly marginalized. It’s no wonder there are populist political movements on the rise that prey on the collective fear of community members who are increasingly isolated, unheard, or left behind. 

Evolutionary “fight or flight” instincts are natural when individuals are confronted with narratives or threats that leave us believing what was once secure is being stolen or kept for another. We create enemies out of presumed bad actors. We become distrustful of institutions in a world that feels less equal, just, and accessible to the rest of us. We question our associations and beliefs because our social contracts that once promised equality, freedom, and prosperity for all go unrealized. We gravitate to ideological claims that sort humanity into “us” and “them” categories, leaving people to “go it alone.” And when these mindsets take root, anger and resentment usually follow. 

Be About the People

If my Mother is right – and I believe she is – when facing change, challenge, or existential threat, there is a distinctly human response that grounds us in acts of compassion and devotion: be about the people. 

Beyond political agendas, corporate policies, school board decisions, and selfish ambitions, my mother’s proverb for life has been a grounding moral that has guided me in my own. She has taught me that at the end of the day, we are each valued individuals humbly born into this life and then die. What happens between those definitive markers is remembered and enriched in the context of our relationships with others, not our self-serving ambitions. 

“It’s about the people.”

When we step outside our doors and selflessly serve our neighbors, we are reminded that the simple things of life are what unite us as fellow travelers on an earthly journey. Inviting friends for dinner, hosting front yard gatherings with neighbors, coaching little league soccer, volunteering, performing a job in your community, attending a house of worship you identify with while respecting those who don’t, and providing for the vulnerable among us, are everyday activities that put people first. It was Jesus of Nazareth who gave the world the golden rule, “In everything, do to others what you would have them do to you.”[2] He spoke against the sins of anger, hate, and violence; instead calling us to a greater virtue that cultivates strong and healthy communities – love for our neighbors.

“In a world irrevocably changed”[3] and faced with real societal challenges, will we allow ourselves to regress into anger that divides and resentment that undermines our common welfare? Or will we choose compassion that unites and devotion that strengthens our human bonds?

My mother certainly didn’t author the golden rule, but her value for collective hope and healing is wisdom for the rest of us.

“It’s about the people.”

---

[1] Robert Putnam, Bowling Alone: The Collapse and Revival of American Community (2020), 10.

[2] The Holy Bible, Matthew 7:12, New International Version.

[3] Putnam, 403.